Minding Your Own Business

“What you don’t see with your eyes, don’t witness with your mouth.” Says one Jewish Proverb.

And from that one line, I learned a lot. I learned about rumors and how to mind one’s own business.

Believe me, in my 31 years of existence I have met a lot of people which are annoying and irritating the hell out of me. But I learned how to control myself, except if I’m the one doing the dog fight. As much as possible, I mind my own business. If an advice is solicited then I give advice but if not, I shut the h*ll up, there’s no sense in giving unsolicited advice. If I can’t control myself, I rant. I rant on my friends and I rant on my blogs.

I’ve witnessed a lot of fights– friends, sibling and his significant other but ,in as much as I would like to,I don’t fight their battle for them. I try to keep things peacefully because in the long run, it won’t do anybody any good. You’ll just end up hurting people.

Like I said, minding your own business needs a lot of self control, humility, politeness and respect for the other human being. It will take a lot of understanding on your part that the other person is entitled to his or her particular choice. And he or she has the freedom to follow whatever his choices are.

You have to know and understand that YOU ARE NOT ALWAYS RIGHT and being Miss-Know-It-All or Mr.-Know-It-All will only take people away from you. {Imagine dying alone..harsh right? but that’s the truth}. Hurting other people’s feelings will take you nowhere… and you can’t say you did it because you want them to be better.

Remember, there’s a right way and a wrong way to do everything. It’s also your choice whichever way you’d like to do it. If you don’t know both sides of a story don’t start dipping your ass in there. You’ll end up embarassing yourself sooner or later. Learn to respect others. Every individual has his own set of right and wrong. What’s right for someone maybe wrong for someone else. It is a matter of personal choice and opinion. One has to understand that you can’t just thrust your opinion on someone or criticize them because  theirs is different from yours. You have to respect them if you want to be respected.

It’s not a matter of age either. It’s doesn’t necessarily follow that because you are older, you are wiser. If you have an opinion, it’s good because it shows that you are a thinking individual. If you are thinking, then advice may be solicited from you, specially if you have “been there and done that”. But  let’s face it, taking advice from a person who assumes he/she knows it all is irritating. Specially from people who take it upon themselves to solve another person’s problem.

Remember: Helping when asked is good but being nosy and advising when not asked is BAD.

As for me,whenever these things happen, I’m lucky I have people I can talk to who listens to both sides of a story before forming a conclusion. They don’t judge, they don’t give unsolicited advice and they don’t try to meddle in my affairs, they just LISTEN and give out some comforting words. They’re broad-minded people too.

Yes, I admit, I am MEAN. I can be very mean specially when I need to be but I also know how to control myself and how to act mature. After all, I have to set an example to my daughter.

…but don’t PUSH me, because I can push back.

“God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.”

– reinhold niebuhr